I started a lesbian affair with my mother-in-law during lockdown
DEAR DEIDRE: I’M having a lesbian affair with my mother-in-law, and I am terrified my husband will find out.
Last year, he and I moved in with his parents so we’d be in a bubble for lockdown and they could help with the kids.
Most people moan or joke about their mother-in-law but I’ve always got on really well with mine.
She has a great sense of humour, is kind and looks great for 53.
She had my husband very young — he’s 35 and I’m 40.
She and my father-in-law have had a rocky marriage for years, and just before Christmas they split up, and he moved out.
One night, my husband was at work and the kids were in bed when she suggested we have a drink together and watch a film.
I noticed she was really dolled up and looked beautiful.
In the middle of the film she started crying and confessed she’s a lesbian — that was why her marriage had ended. I comforted and cuddled her, and then she kissed me.
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It felt strange, but really nice, so I kissed her back. She led me up to her bedroom and I didn’t protest. I’ve never had sex with a woman before but it was amazing and so intense.
Since then, we’ve kept on doing it whenever we can. As soon as my husband leaves the room, we have a kiss, and sometimes I’ll sneak into her bed when he’s sleeping.
One night, I fell asleep in her arms. The only reason we didn’t get caught was because my husband had a lie-in.
My feelings for her are growing stronger and I’m sure my husband will notice the looks between us, or catch us in bed. I want to be with her but don’t want to hurt him.
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DEIDRE SAYS: You know that if your husband finds out this will destroy not only your relationship with him, but his relationship with his mother – and your whole family.
He will be devastated that the two people he loves and trusts most in the world have let him down.
His mum may have turned to you for comfort, but encourage her to find support elsewhere and a relationship with somebody else.
Do you really think this relationship has a future? If not, maybe best stop now.
My support pack Can’t Be Faithful? may help to clarify things for you.
As for your marriage, are you still happy with your husband?
Do you have a good sex life?
I’d advise you both to move back to your own home as soon as you can, and work on rebuilding your relationship.
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