My husband goes on and on about how much he misses his first wife

DEAR DEIDRE: I’M my husband’s second wife and he always makes me feel second best.

He and his ex broke up just before their silver wedding and had a terrible divorce. I met him afterwards but was dragged through the misery.


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I am 39, he is 59, like his wife.

Ten years later he still goes on about it – and on and on. He keeps saying he gave her the world but she kept cheating on him.

I feel second best and can’t take much more.

He does nothing to show me he cares and always points out how much better than me she is at everything.

He is totally eating into my self-confidence.

DEIDRE SAYS: No wonder. Tell him his second marriage will end soon, too, unless he makes changes.

He should offload his feelings to a counsellor, not you.

Whenever he starts, say, “It’s not good for me to hear all this,” and calmly walk away.

What did you see in him ten years ago?

Is that still the right man for you or have you matured and need a different man?

You should both see that counsellor.

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