My wife is emptying our account and driving our children under the influence

DEAR DEIDRE: MY wife and I got married within one year of meeting and had a roller-coaster relationship.

We’ve always been fiery and the hot sex was a big part of why I was so attracted to her.

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But five years into our relationship and she is worryingly erratic in her behaviour. I’m seriously worried about the safety of our kids, our finances and her mental state.

She has been emptying our joint account, by hundreds of pounds at a time, and I know she has been driving our children around while she is under the influence.

I am 33 and a communications network project manager, mostly based away from home. She is 29. What can I do about this situation?

DEIDRE SAYS: It does sound like your wife is troubled. If you are away from home a lot she may be feeling lonely.

Can you ask to work closer to home or take time off to support her? 

She may be depressed. Let her know how worried you are for her.

And reiterate how reckless it is to drive after drinking too much, or after taking drugs.

Contact Mind, the National Association for Mental Health (0845 7660 163). They will be able to support your wife and offer counselling free or at low cost. 

You can also talk to the NSPCC helpline for their advice – or 0808 800 5000. 

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