Couple in their 80s say ‘it’s never too late’ to find love
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Express.co.uk spoke to two couples consisting of four individuals who were all widows or widowers before they married anew, in their seventies and eighties. They recalled their meet-cutes and the opportunities they seized to live life to the full.
Ellen, 85, and her late husband were the very first residents to move into Catherine Court, a McCarthy Stone retirement community in Eastleigh. They lived in a one-bed apartment for 10 months, before Ellen’s husband passed away after suffering from Parkinson’s.
Ellen spent the following months and years keeping herself to herself and enjoying the company of her budgie, Kevin.
“It hadn’t even crossed my mind that I could find love again,” she said. “Little did I know that six years later, David would walk into my life.”
David moved into Catherine Court in 2019 after his wife died. He was aware of the retirement community and thought it might make it easier to meet new people and make new friends.
“I hadn’t really thought about making a romantic connection when I moved down to Eastleigh,” David explained. “The appeal was that I could lie in bed and watch the sun come up.”
But the 87-year-old spotted Ellen even before he moved in. While he was chatting to the Court’s sales advisor, Ellen was “nearby talking to someone else”.
David continued: “Being friendly we exchanged hellos and I explained that I was thinking about moving in. She said that the apartment next to her was free, and jokingly asked if I snored as she didn’t want to hear me through the walls, which made us laugh.”
A few weeks later, David wasted no time in knocking on Ellen’s door and asking her out for a coffee.
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Ellen said: “I wasn’t looking for love, but I think we knew from the minute we met that there was a spark – we just clicked.”
Three months after the date, David popped the question and the couple got married in August last year. Ellen moved into David’s flat, which the 85-year-old described as a “love nest”. The pair make the most of life together – going on bus journeys and boat cruises, and cooking for each other.
“All we do is enjoy our lives together,” Ellen said. “We have both seen how life can be cut short, so it’s incredibly important to live for the moment.”
She continued: “The best thing that happened to me was picking McCarthy Stone to move to – otherwise we wouldn’t have met and it’s amazing to have found such happiness again.
“If I could give one bit of advice to anyone in a similar situation to me, I’d say go for it – if you feel you like someone, enjoy it, have fun, and cherish every moment. While you have your health and nobody to answer to, it’s like being a teenager all over again.”
Janet and Alex’s love story is similar to Ellen and David’s. After losing her husband to Dementia three years ago, Janet started to feel isolated in their bungalow in Norfolk.
“My husband used to drive me around and now I was having to get the train from place to place, however, the area we lived in was fairly rural, so it was a long walk from the train station with no street lamps,” she explained. “I knew then that I’d have to move to somewhere more suitable.”
Janet eventually moved into a McCarthy Stone retirement community called Elm Tree Court in Huntingdon. Around the same time, Alex did too.
Although Janet had many friends who visited her following her husband’s death, she said she missed the “intimate connection of a cuddle”.
“At the end of the day your friends go home and that was what I missed the most,” she said.
The 76-year-old reiterated that “it’s never too late to find love”, but she never imagined she would meet someone like Alex.
After exchanging pleasantries at the weekly development coffee mornings at Elm Tree Court, Alex decided to ask Janet to accompany him on a day out.
Janet recalled: “We bonded straight away, and I was won over by Alex’s caring and gentle nature.”
The pair continued to meet up, but “there wasn’t a conscious coupling”. “There was no chat about becoming official, or anything like that, just a companionship and a respect that naturally progressed the more we got to know each other,” Alex explained.
Alex went on to say that he felt very lonely after his wife died, and considered using dating apps before he met Janet.
Although he explained that “finding love didn’t cure me completely as I still miss my wife”, he said he would advise other widows and widowers “to try and find a soulmate and live for today, as long as you don’t hurt anybody in the process”.
“I don’t think it is ever too late to find love – don’t close the door,” he stressed.
Janet added: “Although I never ever expected to meet someone new at this stage in my life, Alex was the best surprise. I think when you reach a certain age you just see the person, and it’s all about how they treat you and how they make you feel.”
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