‘I caught topless best friend pleasuring my boyfriend under the Christmas tree’

A trusted old friend has stolen my man.

Just before Christmas my longest-standing mate called me in tears. She sobbed she was homeless and broke. Her boyfriend had thrown her out and she was desperate for a bed. Could I help?

Of course, I urged her to jump on a bus and come right over. She arrived minutes later (I suspect she was waiting around the corner) and dumped loads of her stuff in my front room.

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My boyfriend opened a bottle of wine and they started necking it. I had to go to work and left them to it. Over the next few days, I continued to work, cook and clear up while they drank – and flirted.

Eventually I blew my top. I accused them of being selfish and taking advantage.

They looked sheepish and said “sorry”, but 24 hours later I caught them under the Christmas tree. She was topless and pleasuring him in a way I’ve always refused to do…

I started throwing stuff (shoes, cushions, plates etc) and could-n’t stop. They screamed that I was crazy, so I threw some more. I stomped round to my parents’ house and left them to it.

Now she’s at her sister’s place and my guy is joining her there. He says they’re in love.

He’s moving out this weekend. He thinks things will work out with her long term and that he and I don’t have any future.

This is a living nightmare. I trusted her and now they’ve both let me down.

My parents are trying to make me feel better by saying they never liked him, so I find myself shouting at them to shut up.

What did I do to deserve this shower of sorrow?

JANE SAYS: I can understand that you feel shocked and very let down right now.

You tried to be helpful and kind. You offered a desperate “friend” a safe place to lay her head, but now she’s stolen your man and you’re upset and angry.


Keep cool and retain your dignity. You’ve been betrayed and humiliated, but you cannot allow them to break you.

Explain to your parents that their comments may be well-meaning, but they’re not helpful. Apologise for shouting at them because there’s no point in hurting the ones who genuinely love you.

Sadly, everything is up in the air. Your “friend” has betrayed you and your boyfriend is halfway out the door.

But console yourself with the thought that if he was so quick to cheat on you, he couldn’t have been much of a catch in the first place.

Cry your eyes out, thump your pillow and then vow to bounce back. Turn to friends and family for support and put this behind you.

Stay strong and be ready just in case your cheating boyfriend attempts to come crawling back to you in the coming weeks or months.

He doesn’t deserve a second chance – he messed on his own doorstep and has put you through too much.

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