‘I’m 55 he’s 33, we’re having fun and we don’t care what others think’

A woman explained that she is having “a great time” with a man who is 12 years younger and although he is “totally cool with it”, she is concerned about the “appropriateness of the gap”. She asked other women to share their “age gap relationship stories” on the online forum Mumsnet.

Many took to the comments section to share their own stories with one woman with username @BreakerOfBras explaining she met her husband when he was 20 and she was 33.

“We have been together for four years and both very very happy to be in each other’s lives, 13 years difference…

“I know it’s the kind of age gap people describe as ‘icky’ or weird, but neither of us is remotely bothered by what others think.”

Other women with larger age gaps admitted they are often concerned about it. A woman with the username @BeautyGoesToBenidorm said that she is 15 years older than her husband.

She explained that when it comes to maturity in her relationship, no one would ever know there was an age gap as she is “the childish one”.

However, she admitted being worried about her looks. “I won’t lie, I’m often very conscious of ageing/my looks (I’m nearly 39) in a way I wasn’t when I was married to a man seven years older than me.”

The woman added that although her husband thinks she is “utterly gorgeous”, her appearance is “very much an issue” for her.

Another woman, @bigdecisionstomake, who is 54 and her husband is 35, a 19-year gap, explained that when they were first together she “was really conscious of what people thought”.

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She admitted that they have their ups and downs, as all relationships do, “but none of them specifically relate to the age difference”.

However, his parents found it difficult to begin with but “are accepting it now” and added: “Broadly speaking I think it only needs to be an issue if you make it one.”

Other women shared their very successful relationships with forum user @dramalessllama saying: “I’m 55, he’s 33. We’re having fun and neither of us cares what others think.”

Another one, @crosbystillsandmash, explained that she is 12 years older than her husband and the gap “feels massive” at the moment as she is in her 50s and he is still in his 30s.

She explained: “I used to look considerably older than him but these days people hardly notice.

“I think men age quicker than women maybe and I do probably look quite young for my age, so we look closer in age these days.”

Although she now “rarely” thinks about the age difference, in the early days she “was constantly thinking and worrying about it”.

Forum user @Maggiesgirl revealed that out of her three marriages, the one with the biggest age difference has been the most successful one.

“First one older man and violent, only lasted four years. Second one same age he cheated after three years.

“Third, 10 years younger and coming up to 25 years together married for 22 of them. Wouldn’t swap him for the world.”

Another woman, @BeanieTeen, opined that age gaps are not a big deal anymore although when someone is “18 or 19 and the other is in their 30s or 40s that it’s a bit weird”.

“If you can be friends with people not your age I don’t see why you couldn’t be in a relationship either. But if someone was in their 50s and great mates with someone who’s 18 – I think that would be strange, personally.”

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