My 12-year-old daughter died from a broken heart

Why I can’t celebrate Mother’s day: My daughter died from a broken heart on the anniversary of her father taking his own life

• Faye Smith, from Sheffield, lost her daughter Gabi in 2013
• She suffered from non-epileptic attack disorder after the death of her father
• READ MORE: I give my 11-year-old cannabis to stop his 500 seizures a month

A grieving widow will mark Mother’s Day with a charity walk for her daughter who suffered seizures brought on by grief after her father died.

Faye Smith, from Sheffield, lost her daughter Gabi in 2013, exactly two years to the day her husband took his own life.

Doctors believe the seizure, which killed her as she took a bath, was triggered by the stress of losing her father.

The mum-of-two, 56, is now planning a memorial walk this Mother’s Day weekend in her daughter’s memory and says walking has offered her solace and support during her grief.

The walk will take in some of Gabi’s favourite spots, and it is the last walk she ever did with her mum and brother Zach, now 26, just six days before her passing.

Faye Smith, from Sheffield, with her daughter Gabi, who died aged 12, and her son Zach, now 26

Faye Smith, from Sheffield, will mark Mother’s Day with a charity walk for her daughter who suffered seizures brought on by grief after her father died

Faye, who has formed the Hope Walking group, said: ‘Gabi loved to walk, she loved the outdoors, just like me. 

‘Walking has become my therapy over the years and on the tenth anniversary of losing Gabi, we will walk and remember her with love.’

Gabi’s world was shattered when her 47-year old father took his own life after struggling with alcohol addiction. Around a year later, aged 11, she suffered a severe seizure, out of the blue.

Faye said: ‘We were driving home one night after dropping her brother, Zach, off at a birthday party and she suddenly shot back in the car seat and collapsed forward onto the dashboard.

‘Her lips were blue, and her eyes were rolling back. I rushed her to hospital, and for a while they thought it might be epilepsy.

‘But tests suggested it was something called non-epileptic attack disorder (NEAD). It’s rare and doctors said it was probably triggered by the trauma of her dad’s death.’

There is no cure for the disorder but Gabi responded well to therapy and she worked through her grief, began making friends again, and Faye felt she was returning to the bright, happy, child she had been before her trauma

On March 16 2013, on the second anniversary of her father’s death, Gabi (left) drowned in the bath, on what started as a normal Saturday morning

Tests suggested Gabi had something called non-epileptic attack disorder (NEAD) which is a rare condition and doctors said it was probably triggered by the trauma of her dad’s death

There is no cure for the disorder but Gabi responded well to therapy. She worked through her grief, began making friends again, and Faye felt she was returning to the bright, happy, child she had been before her trauma.

But on March 16 2013, on the second anniversary of her father’s death, Gabi drowned in the bath, on what started as a normal Saturday morning.

Faye said: ‘Gabi hadn’t come out of the bathroom so I banged on the door. When she didn’t reply, I broke the door down. We tried to revive her, and she was rushed to hospital, but it was too late.’

Faye said: ‘Nothing can prepare you for the death of a child or ease the pain. But I wanted to honour Gabi’s memory.’

In 2016, Faye took a solo trip around Australia. It was a trip she had promised Gabi they would do together and she took Gabi’s teddy bear, Fudge, along with her.

Faye, who has formed the Hope Walking group, said Gabi ‘loved to walk’ and it has ‘become therapy over the years’

On the tenth anniversary of losing Gabi, the group will walk and remember her with love

Faye is planning a walk from Ashford in the Water to Bakewell and back round the Monsal Trail, which was a favourite of Gabi’s and the last walk she ever did with her mum and brother just six days before she died

She said: ‘Gabi and I used to talk about all the animals we wanted to see, so I was ticking those off as I went. I saw an echidna, a kangaroo, a wallaby, a Tasmanian devil, all in the wild.

‘And each time, I was saying ”Gabi look, I’ve seen it!”. I believe she knew I was doing it all for her.’

Faye, who runs communications agency Keep Your Fork, returned to Sheffield feeling energised and positive, already making more plans in Gabi’s memory.

This coming Mother’s Day weekend will mark 10 years since Gabi’s death.

In 2016, Faye took a solo trip around Australia. It was a trip she had promised Gabi they would do together and she took Gabi’s teddy bear, Fudge, along with her

Faye travelled around Australia in her daughter’s memory and saw all of the thing they had planned to see together 

Walking has become an important part of Faye’s life and over the years different women friends have joined her

What is non-epileptic attack disorder (NEAD)?

Non-epileptic seizures can look and feel like seizures caused by epilepsy.

However they are not actually caused by abnormal electrical activity in the brain, like epileptic seizures. 

Non-epileptic attacks happen when the brain is unable to control specific thoughts, memories, emotions or sensations. 

This could relate to a stress or trauma that has occurred.

Symptoms include: 

People lose control of their body 

Shaking or other movements of arms and legs 

Blacking out 

Unresponsive 

Change in breathing 

Source: The Brain Charity 

Faye is planning a walk from Ashford in the Water to Bakewell and back round the Monsal Trail, which was a favourite of Gabi’s and the last walk she ever did with her mum and brother just six days before she died.

It is being organised with the help of the Sheffield 40s Ramblers Group, which Faye joined four years ago to help with her recovery. The group is fundraising for the England Coast Path Appeal.

Faye said: ‘Over the years, and the challenges I have faced, walking has helped me to heal and to grow. 

‘It has become such an important part of my life, a form of therapy, and over the years different women friends have joined me; some are walking to get through a bereavement or a divorce, menopause or health issues. Some have empty nests and time on their hands.

‘Gabi loved to walk and I will be thinking of her every step of the way, giving me hope, strength and a new belief in myself.’

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