My horny fella wants to bonk our neighbours – but we left last home over it
My partner wants to advertise to our new neighbours that we’re swingers, but I’m done with all that.
We’ve just moved into a swanky new-build in a gorgeous town. He’s got a higher-paid job and I’m working from home as beauty therapist.
I thought the plan was to clean up our act and reinvent ourselves – be respectable for once in our lives.
READ MORE: 'My fella wants to bonk his ex-girlfriend one last time – and I can join in or watch'
But he’s convinced that there are swingers nearby. He’s noticed pampas grasses growing in the front gardens of several houses (a traditional calling-card for swinging).
He claims he walked past one of these houses the other day and the female owner gave him the eye.
He’s also been online and checked out local swinging clubs and hot action, which I’m very annoyed about because it’s something I expressly asked him not to do. He tries to sweet talk me by saying that I’m gorgeous and fun and wasted on one man (him).
When do we finally draw a line under our open relationship and appetite for other lovers and settle down? I’m contented and happy in our current location.
The only reason we left our last place was because things got too hairy with jealous partners and complaining neighbours.
The woman who lived next door to us never stopped moaning about our wild parties and bubbling hot tub. She branded us “disgusting reprobates” and even wrote to my ex-boss telling him that I was a pervert.
My guy says she was simply jealous because we never invited her over to join in, but he conveniently forgets the other dramas. When is enough, enough?
JANE SAYS: It’s worrying that your partner doesn’t listen to you. From what I understand, you’ve told him that you have no interest in swinging again. Been there, done that.
But he’s refusing to take that on board.
During your time in your last property, you hosted sex parties that occasionally got out of hand because jealousy reared its ugly head.
The fact is that with sex comes emotion. I’m not surprised that, in passionate and highly charged moments, that friction and conflict sometimes resulted.
Now you’re more interested in a calm and controlled environment. You’re in a new home and determined to reinvent yourself. From flirting with a neighbour to going
online and checking out local swingers, he’s being proactive and that’s counter to your wishes.
You need to level with the man about how you want your life to be versus his desire to carry on having sex with multiple partners.
Unfortunately, if he doesn’t respect you or take your views seriously, and if he thinks it appropriate to grind you down, then is this relationship healthy and sustainable?
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