Stuck in 'the phone zone'? How to turn your online match into an IRL date
In the world of digital dating, time is of the essence.
When connection is the goal, nobody wants to get stuck in a textationship.
According to research by dating app Hinge, 62% of Hinge daters feel ready to schedule a date after three days, but only 34% of Hinge daters actually plan a date within this time frame.
Instead, they find themselves trapped in the dreaded ‘phone zone’, which can best be described as a never-ending texting phase, with the possibility of an IRL date becoming less and less likely by the day.
Hinge’s research found that half (51%) of daters have found themselves in this position in the last three months alone.
So, how do you avoid the dreaded phone zone?
It’s simple: make the move – and fast.
How to avoid the phone zone
If you’re worried that three days of chatting isn’t enough Hinge’s director of relationship science, Logan Ury, suggests testing your assumptions.
‘Remember that great textual chemistry doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll vibe in person,’ she said.
‘Wouldn’t you rather figure that out sooner? It doesn’t hurt to try a different approach by meeting earlier.’
She also suggests trying a visual date first, too, if you want to test the vibes before committing a whole evening to a potentially bad date.
‘If you want a vibe-check of your compatibility before you meet up in person, start with a video date,’ she said.
‘They’re a safe, low-pressure way to connect.’
Finally, if you’re too nervous to straight up ask somebody on a date, try to find a natural segue.
‘The next time they start to tell you a story, try telling them that you’d rather hear it in person, and suggest a place and time to meet up,’ said Logan.
‘Or, if they ask you a question, say, “It’s kind of a long story to type, I’ll tell you about it in person! Drinks tomorrow?”.’
Et voila, you’ve avoided the phone zone.
Logan’s top tips for avoiding the phone zone:
Getting into the phone zone is easy, getting out is nigh on impossible.
Here are some of Logan’s top tips for avoiding falling into the trap of another textationship.
- Suggest a date after three days of chatting.
- Don’t text too much before the first date – make sure to save some topics to discover in person.
- Test your assumptions. Who knows, you might prefer getting to know someone in person rather than over text.
- Try a virtual date first.
- Suggest the conversation continues in person.
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