Why you've been using your napkin wrong your whole life

Etiquette expert reveals how you should be using your napkin (and you’ve been doing it wrong your whole life)

  • Etiquette expert Julie Lamberg-Burnet shared how to properly use a napkin
  • The expert said you should always wait for your host before opening yours
  • You need to put it on your lap at waist height with the fold pointing towards you 
  • She said you should never put it back on the table if you get up for the bathroom 

An etiquette expert has revealed why you’ve been using your napkin wrong, and what you should be doing instead to demonstrate good manners.

Julie Lamberg-Burnet, from the Sydney School of Protocol, posted on TikTok, where she explained that the vast majority of people pick their napkin up too early, when they should really be waiting for their host.

‘My first tip for using your table napkin correctly is wait until the host picks their table napkin up,’ Julie said on TikTok.

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An etiquette expert has revealed why you’ve been using your napkin wrong, and what you should be doing instead to demonstrate good manners (Julie Lamberg-Burnet pictured)

If there is no designated host, wait until two or three others seat themselves at the table before placing it in your lap. 

Tips to using your table napkin correctly 

TIP ONE: Wait until the host sits down before you unfold your napkin.

TIP TWO: Keep it low when you unfold it rather than up around your shoulders, and put the fold closest to your waist with the corners facing outwards.

TIP THREE: Never put the napkin back on the table if you need to get up. Instead, put it loosely on your chair.

TIP FOUR: When you’re finished your meal, take your napkin loosely and place it down either to the left of your plate or where your plate was if it has gone.

Once you have picked up your napkin and taken it out of its holder, Julie said the key is to ‘keep it low’ when you’re putting it on your lap.

‘Don’t float it around up here,’ she said, gesticulating around her shoulders wildly.

‘Unfold it at waist height, upon which stage you’ll see that there is a fold.

‘Put the fold closest to your waist,’ she added, explaining that the reason why you need to do this is because you can then take a corner ‘easily and pick it up and dab your face if you have food on your face’.

‘Just make sure the fold stays in place during the meal,’ Julie said.

When it comes to going to the bathroom or getting up from the table, the etiquette expert said there is one major faux pas that too many diners do: they put their napkin back on the table when they get up.

‘If you’re going to excuse yourself from the table, the key is to pick it up really loosely and then leave your napkin on your seat,’ Julie said.

‘If you’re at a restaurant, you’ll sometimes find the waiters and waitresses put it over the back of your chair. That’s acceptable too.’ 

Finally, when it comes to the end of the meal, the best course of action is to put your napkin back loosely either on the left of your plate or where the plate was if it has disappeared

Finally, when it comes to the end of the meal, the best course of action is to put your napkin back loosely either on the left of your plate or where the plate was if it has disappeared.

‘Don’t fold it up in a parcel, but take it by the tip and loosely lay it here,’ Julie said.

‘This indicates you’re finished.’ 

Thousands of people who saw the clip were quick to thank Julie for posting it and say it was useful.

‘Thank you for sharing this,’ one person commented. 

Julie has made a name for herself on TikTok for sharing educational videos around table manners and etiquette in general (stock image)

Julie has made a name for herself on TikTok for sharing educational videos around table manners and etiquette in general.

Recently, she shared her five tips for making a confident entrance into a room.

First of all, Julie said you need to close the door behind you. 

Once you’ve done this, she recommends you step to one side, stand tall and pause, then survey the room to see who is in it and where.

Once you’ve done this, she said you can ‘walk with confidence to an open group’ and finally introduce yourself.  

To find out more about Julie Lamberg-Burnet, you can visit the Sydney School of Protocol here.

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