Everyone's talking about: How to be a man

Everyone’s talking about: How to be a man

Is this anything to do with tech billionaires?

It is. In a fit of see-you-behind-the-bike-sheds bravado, Twitter boss Elon Musk has challenged Meta boss Mark Zuckerberg to a fight.

Why?

Earlier this month, Zuckerberg launched Threads, a rival to Musk’s Twitter.

Isn’t there space in the sandpit for all to play nicely with their social media platforms?

Apparently not. When Musk tweeted that he would be ‘up for a cage match’, Zuckerberg hit back: ‘send me location’. The latest barbs began when Zuckerberg posted a laughing emoji on Threads, after Wendy’s fast-food chain suggested he go into space ‘to really make Musk mad’. Musk, in response, tweeted ‘Zuck is a c**k’ – an insult derived from ‘cuckold’ and adopted by the alt-right. ‘I propose a literal d**k-measuring contest,’ he added, next to an emoji of a ruler.

Is this anything to do with tech billionaires? It is. In a fit of see-you-behind-the-bike-sheds bravado, Twitter boss Elon Musk has challenged Meta boss Mark Zuckerberg to a fight

I’ve seen Musk pictured in leather armour. Is he modelling himself on Russell Crowe in Gladiator?

Possibly, although if he was going for the ‘At my signal, unleash hell!’ vibe then all he’s unleashed so far are some stroppy tweets.

Will the two actually fight?

As YOU went to press, both men had been in talks with the president of the UFC (Ultimate Fighting Championship – the world’s premier mixed martial arts competition), so: a definite maybe.

If they do, who’ll win?

Bookies favour Zuckerberg over Musk currently – at 39, he’s 13 years younger and has been practising jiu-jitsu since 2022.

Still, Musk – just over six feet tall and at least 165lb – does have a height and weight advantage.

Are people backing Musk-the-underdog then?

Not really. The public mood towards the clash of the tech titans might best be described as ‘whatever’.

What are they saying?

Responding to a Times story on the duel, readers suggested venues for the fight including ‘a play-pen’ and ‘a shark tank’.

Anyway, I thought ‘soft masculinity’ was all the rage.

Yes, it’s hard to be a man this summer. While Musk and Zuckerberg squared up on social media, the publishing world announced that ‘cinnamon-roll man’ was what female readers of romantic fiction were after.

Who?

He has a hard exterior but is  soft in the middle.

So, what would cinnamon-roll man do if Musk challenged him to a cage fight?

Engage him in something physical yet bonding and enriching – maybe a hike round an Iron Age hill fort – during which Musk would feel empowered to reveal his vulnerability.

And then they’d fight afterwards?

No, they’d say something charming about male potential and cry.

Could Ted Lasso be at the root of all this?

Not entirely. Netflix political thriller The Diplomat also riffs on male identity, featuring a man happy to let his wife take centre stage – as a diplomat. The Wall Street Journal described him as a ‘power househusband’.

I’ve read about the rise of the domestically aware ‘doesband’ – so is that the same thing?

Think of ‘power househusband’ as an upgrade. ‘Doesband’ knows what’s going down in Waitrose. ‘Power househusband’ knows what’s going down in Whitehall.

In view of all this, surely the touchy-feely camp will soon win the battle for male souls.

You might think so, but the ‘come over here and say that’ brigade has a rich artistic history on which to draw.

Go on…

Writer Ben Macintyre reminds us that, in 1870, the artist Manet skewered a critic in the chest, while Proust challenged a journalist to a duel, missed and went on to write À la Recherche du Temps Perdu.

And had cage fighting existed one assumes Manet and Proust would’ve waded in.

Ditto the writer Charles Augustin Sainte-Beuve, who duelled with the proprietor of French paper Le Globe under an umbrella.

An umbrella! Disdain for an unmanly opponent?

No, something much more beta male: he didn’t want to get wet.

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